My New Life

I'm back after a long break! It feels great to be blogging again but I am happy that I decided to take a break from all kinds of social networking media. It has been a refreshing two-month break from Facebook and I do not plan to return. I have had enough of people- watching and laying out my life in the open for others to see. Of course I am aware of the numerous benefits of networking sites, but I have reached a point in my life where I feel I cannot relate to the "socializing" anymore.

This post is not a critique about technology, the internet or social media, nor is it an attempt to recapture the readers of this blog who have been guessing the reason behind my absence. I have decided to blog when I have something new to say regardless of the readership of my blog. The number of posts, challenges and prompts don't seem to matter now. And I am not going to visit all the blogs in the universe to increase the viewership of my blog. I feel that I want to do things just for the pure joy I get out of it. Whether I am appreciated or not, criticized or not.

Competition and comparison have become very much part of our lives that often we fail to do things we truly desire. We forgo many of our pleasures just to seem "alright" or "normal". I have changed a lot as an individual in the last two months. I have made major changes in my lifestyle that I know are in the positive direction. I will definitely share my learning in this space. So if you are still interested and decide to follow Words from My Heart and Head, thank you :)

I have also started working with an organisation as a facilitator of learning. Yes! I am doing what I love a lot- teaching and learning. I will also be blogging or painting when I feel I need to express my thoughts and feelings. I will be living in close connection with nature (reviving those lost ties), rediscovering the joy of a clutter free, simple life and focusing on healthy, organic living.

These desires of my heart had been lying dormant in an environment of family and friends caught in a mad race to attain "success" or "the best life" the quality of which none really is sure about. But I have finally found the courage to stand by my convictions and to live life the way I want to regardless of what other people may think or say. I had been toying with the idea of turning Vegan for the past two years but I have finally begun that journey. It has not been easy at all, to convince "well meaning" family members about my right to have a choice.

I notice that my writing is a little rusty and needs a little oiling. So see you soon with another post. I would love to hear from you, but will definitely understand if you remain silent. I will still keep building this space with words :) Have a great weekend.

First Times

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"When was the last time you did something for the first time?" This is one phrase my husband overuses. On our first date, our wedding day, upon writing the first love note, during our trips together, our cooking adventures, a game of scrabble or any random moment he surprises me with this question. I suggest you ask yourself this question and reflect for a moment.

Do you love trying out new things? Do you make an effort or do you succumb to the usual excuse about not having enough time? Are you stuck in a rut and wish for something "different" or "crazy" to happen? Of course most of us have hobbies to keep our creative sides active or go on holidays to unwind and relax but for many others these interests take a backseat due to various reasons.

I like trying out new things. I am totally in love with the idea of learning (one of the reasons why I enjoy teaching). I remember that even as a child, I was constantly on the lookout for new ideas, new games, new hobbies, new hideouts and "new" mischief! Trust me, doing something for the first time brings a feeling of freshness and joy of accomplishment no matter how silly a thing it seems. Who knows, you may discover something new about yourself - a talent an interest or even a quirk.

After the A to Z challenge, I desperately wanted to do something different. Unable to come up with anything interesting, I opened my cupboard and sifted through a cluttered pile of random things (stationery, greeting cards, dried flowers, paint and so on). When I chanced upon an abandoned drawing book, I almost shouted "Eureka!" 

What started off as a few overlapping free hand circles ended up like this:

And led to this:

I was hooked and so deeply lost in the drawing that my mom had to remind me of lunch time. It was a soothing experience that left me happy and proud. I definitely will do more of this when I get bored. But right now I'm on the lookout for new things to try :)

When was the last time you did something for the first time? Think of it and do leave a comment or even better, do something new today and then tell me!


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Zestful

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Rohan carried the tray with crispy, buttery masala dosas and filter coffee to the table where Tara sat waiting. “I can’t believe we are catching up on our lives after almost a decade!” He found it strange that he felt immensely happy to bump into his long lost friend who had meant the world to him not too long ago. He felt a pang of guilt for letting their friendship fade with time.

They talked animatedly stopping in between only to savour the delicious dosas and piping hot coffee. Tara reminded him of those days when they had been extremely eager to do many things in life. “Do you remember the promise we made by the lake?” When he seemed puzzled, she reminded him.

“We had vowed never to lose the zest to live. We had promised to keep in touch with our silliest of wishes and passions and to never get bogged down by hurdles. You remember?” Tara was bubbling with an excitement and energy level that he felt he couldn't catch up with. He learned that she had followed her heart living all her dreams, taking up challenges with a smile, never belittling her resilience.

He felt tired to chase those dreams now. He felt old. Having settled for a comfortable desk job he had seen everything else in life as a burden. He had always chosen the easier route and compromised on his dreams. Every situation had been just a problem to be solved.

But now in a little coffee shop talking to her, he wondered if he had lived or just existed. Tara, the bubbly teen who he had once loved secretly, who he had rejected for fear of her optimism that he thought was blinding, had just made him fall in love again. With her, with life and with himself.

P.S: Today I have successfully completed the Ultimate Blog Challenge and A to Z challenge. It has been one hell of a journey with crazy moments, a true roller coaster. More than the destination, I enjoyed the happiness that the journey brought- the tiny ups and downs, the friendships that it fostered, the lessons I learnt, the confidence I gathered and some amazing blogs I read. A big thank you to my fellow bloggers and my readers :) Cheers to zestful living!

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Wonderful

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The lights went out. Rachel waited quietly in her bed for half an hour. She tiptoed to the window of her room, the last on the B Wing corridor of the women’s hostel. Outside, she could see the silhouettes of the chapel and the administrative block. Black trees stood still against the deep purple sky. “Seven months and three days” she murmured to herself.

For seven months and three days her life had moved ahead like clockwork. She had a fixed routine that had to be diligently adhered to. Worse, there were many restrictions in place. The food in the mess was lousy and the gates closed by seven in the evening. The lights went out at ten at night and she had to be in bed, no matter what.

The sudden confinement at the convent after her carefree school days suffocated her. She longed to go out on her own and do things she liked. Things that her time-table at the hostel had left out. She did not want to do anything crazy or dangerous, just something that would make her feel good again. Something outside her monotonous schedule.

She moved away from the window and walked stealthily along the corridor. Climbing the stairs to the terrace in her night clothes and flip flops, her hands gripping a package wrapped in newspaper, she felt accomplished in a strange way. Laying out the contents of the package she smiled her best smile. She had invited a few of her friends, but they had been too scared.

“Happy birthday to me!” she sang alone into the night. She wasn't sure if it was the wine or the momentary freedom, but she felt wonderful as she lay under the starry sky.

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Content

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Her wardrobe was an explosion of colour and glitz. Radhika was spoilt for choice when it came to clothes, accessories and almost everything else she wanted. She was the pampered wife of a millionaire who went on endless business trips around the globe in search of better deals and more money. They owned a lot wealth and lead a lavish life; an outsider could never find any flaws in their life.

Yet, as she stood in front of her cupboard trying to decide what to wear to the party that night, she felt a strange sense of emptiness. She couldn't fathom what it was. Maybe it was time to shop for new clothes and bags. Maybe the diamonds had been worn too many times and it was time for a new set. Or could it be because it had been long since a holiday in an exotic resort in a faraway land?

What was it she lacked? Why did she feel empty? Her thoughts were disturbed as she looked down from her window at the adjoining slum. Where did these people come from? She watched with shock and disgust as two urchins sifted through the garbage, picking bottles and jars. When their sacks fattened up with objects of glass and plastic, they exchanged them with a man, for some money.

The children dashed to the nearby shop that sold fly infested samosas, pastries and snacks dripping with oil. Radhika watched them munch hungrily on the samosas. Their faces burst into smiles as they wiped their oily hands on their knickers and prepared for a nap near the stinking pile of garbage. She then realised what was wrong. She had never once felt content.





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Reasons to Smile

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I've heard it’s a bad world out there

filled with people who don’t care,

with not a trace of goodness left,

hopes murdered by treachery and theft.

But a fleeting smile on a stranger’s face,

a hand to clasp on gloomy days,

tears of joy, someone to befriend

a heart that awaits sorrow’s end,

blossoming love in differences stark,

a burning candle in the darkest of dark,

fiercely kept promises, never forgotten,

the tender touch of a child begotten,

patterned doodles on new painted walls,

space on the bed for the bears and dolls,

a love-struck couple on a romantic date

and words of apology, sincere even if late

tell my heart to bring forth the smiles

that will surely see me through miles;

I believe there’s goodness everywhere

if only to see them we show some care.

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P.S : My list of reasons to smile is endless, just shared a few. Keep Smiling :)

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A Friend For Life

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A new found friend

you stepped in to blend

with my life, to win

my heart and reside within.

Over cups of tea

our thoughts flowed free,

occasionally trapped

within love notes wrapped.

You came to my door

and offered nothing more

than a tender stroke of my hair

promising a lifetime of care.

A man of words very few

a heart full of love so new,

you rarely needed words

to bridge our different worlds.

In simple silence you waved

a magic wand I craved

to create new cheer

with someone so dear.

Akin to sky and land

sometimes, water and sand

different we may be

but so are lock and key.

At every day’s start

I seek a promise from my heart

for a special place to keep

this friendship so deep.




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The Memory Box

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Tucked away within the powdery dust

of layered thoughts recent and crusted,

lies a memory box with secrets locked

by a promise ancient yet trusted.

A whiff of its dark air deeply perfumed

by a cherished childhood complete,

takes me back to days bygone

through objects that seem obsolete.

Its hesitant creak upon my touch

sends forth ripples of innocent laughter

from carefree days lived to the brim

with no worry of what came after.

I caress its contents treasured-

feathers dyed, leaves dried,

letters inked, stones that winked,

coiled cones bequeathed by the tide.

Cradled deep within my memory box

is a handful of special red seeds

and brown ones with silken white tufts

wedged between luck-bringing weeds.

The broken red of bangles, bright

as the untouched bits of a heart forsaken

Faded petals, dry and brittle

once crimson with the love I’d taken.

Inside my little memory box

that mirrors a life of perfection

I seek refuge on rainy days

to see a sunny smile on my reflection.

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Before I Kick the Bucket

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Dreams, I feel fuel life, a well lived life. Being the planned person I am, listing out things I like to do gives me a sense of purpose in life. I believe in doing things that I love to do, whether it appeals to others or not, follows trends of society or not. I have a really long bucket list ready and I keep going back to it, crossing out what I have already achieved and experienced, sometimes adding new ones to the list. This list of mine includes the simplest of things that give immense joy (like watching the sun rise above the horizon as I sip tea with my husband, making a sand castle in a beach) as well as other things like travel that require serious planning. Whatever be the case, each one is special and important to me and so I found it really difficult to pick just five from them.But here they are and they pretty much define what kind of a person I am. So here they are:

To be an urban farmer and having a small organic farm or garden without doubt tops my bucket list. I’m a passionate over of all things green and natural, and dream of living amidst greenery. I would love to experience the joy of picking fresh, home grown, chemical-free produce for my kitchen. I have inherited the green thumb from my dad and even with the severe space constraints I’m faced with presently, I manage to have a really small organic terrace garden. I would love to have a green patch of land (that seems a luxury these days) to unwind with my family.

Working for underprivileged children is something I feel is one of my missions in life. I want to contribute to society with the skills that I possess, most importantly my passion for teaching and interacting with children. The two years I worked as a teacher at an NGO, I can easily say has been the best part of my career that taught me valuable lessons. I wish to take it forward and dedicate the rest of my career to this cause. Some things just cannot be bought with money. It is absolutely true in the case of the satisfaction I get by teaching children from deprived backgrounds. I wish to continue to make a difference in others' lives by doing something meaningful. This will also help me realize another dream of mine, which is to be a lifelong learner.

A Jungle safari and a camp in the wild are next on my list. I would love to experience the thrill of being in the wilderness. Living in a tent, hiking, staying in tree houses, spotting wild animals and the like really appeal to me. I would love to explore North East India, savouring its unspoiled beauty.

Someday, I wish to experience rural life. I certainly have plans to experience the charming simplicity of life in rural India. I am a big fan of all things simple, so I dream of spending a few weeks in a mud house tucked away in a village, befriending the locals and learning a thing or two from them. I want to taste a life with minimal needs, away from busy city life, being in touch with nature, having all the time in the world to chat with neighbours, sleep under a starry sky and maybe, fly kites and climb trees.

For this last one I know I have miles to go, but I sincerely hope one day I have at least a book to my credit. My journey as a blogger has just begun, but I’m dreaming big. I intend to write a book that people will hold close to their heart- a book with words that make my readers smile, laugh and cry from the heart. 

Written for Indiblogger (Indi Happy Hours) in association with IDBI Federal Lifesurance Whole Life - Befikar Umar Bhar 

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Success

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A distant dream

reserved for the cream-

those chosen few;

was the success I knew.

The smile on my face

on darkest of days

like bright sunshine,

said success was mine.

A dizzy escalation

calling for celebration

of unfolding life new

was the success I knew.

A simple pleasure

I pursue at leisure;

a word, dot and line

said success was mine.

A final destination

permanent coronation

a hill top with a view,

was the success I knew

Shedding wilted and worn

for the new leaves born;

a growing vine

said success was mine.

My failures and learning

flames of hope burning

simple joys bursting seams,

life with success gleams.

Successfully completed the Ultimate Blog Challenge :)